My Perspectives on Human Sexuality

This is a comprehensive look at the results of the life experiences that have molded and shaped my sexual perspectives. I have had several different things that have happened to shape my thoughts and actions inn my sexual life. Yet now that I have taken this course I have gained a new found understanding for the reactions that were part of my life. The value system that I was raised under was very strict. I was brought up in a Holiness religion, where we were not allowed to do several of the things that others were doing.

We were not allowed to be alone in the room with the opposite sex after we reached an age of understanding, 5-6 years old. This was to make sure that there was no exploration of the other sex and that purity was maintained. The value system I believe is dependant upon the religious up bringing and the cultural beliefs of the community in which one lives. Some examples of these are that Christians do not belief in sexual contact until after a couple has been married and this expectation is for only male to female marriages.Where the Neo-Pagan religion is more of an open and accepting religion, where different sex relationships are acceptable. Intercourse is exchanged without the bonds of marriage.

Sexual acts are freely given if all parties are willing to accept the sexual contact and they are consenting adults. Even in this community there are actions taken if one attempts to sexually attack a person of underage, unwillingness and acceptance of the sexual intent. Sexuality In some cultures there are rituals performed that offer experience to the young adults that the elders of the same sex perform.These are looked as rites of passage for the child to come of age and become an acting member of the tribe.

These children may be as young as 13 years old and when they reach a more knowledgeable age they will be presented to their selected mate form a close village. These tribes often times express the points of self satisfaction which are to help provide a footing for martial bliss. Although here in the United States, it is looked upon as a disgrace if a child is taught or has learned to provide their self with self satisfaction.It is looked at as the parents not protecting their offspring from the offensive actions of the sexual world. In the earlier years of our existence, we were able to see that sexual actions provide the continuation of our human race. The acts of sex were preformed when and where ever the urge would take place, no matter the audience that may be at hand.

Then as we became more knowledgeable we started to accept the fact that by choosing a mate we could experience the close contact of another and often have sexual satisfaction with them in a more private setting.Then religions began to place thoughts that what we were doing was an abomination to God, of certain religions. Yet many of our ways did not erase their selves from our minds. The more primitive mind stayed with us and this sexual gratification was a need. In the more recent years early 50-60’s we were thought to only have sexual relations within the confines of marriage.

If a young lady were to have sexual relations outside of a marriage then she was looked down upon by society. Then the change began in the late 60’s and 70’s, with the drugs that were being used and free Sexuality love was the saying.Yet we found out in the next decade that having free love could cost a life, that life being yours. Several sexual related illness and diseases were found in this decade and many were told to start using protection.

Even with these diseases becoming more prevalent, the sexual revolution was no laying still. We had a flood of same sex relationships that were becoming made more public and that this had been a situation that was just starting to be known. By the next decade we were starting to accept the same sex relationships, yet there was still some resistance from certain religious groups.I believe that in this world if you fond love then you need to grab it and hold on, because it is very hard to find acceptance and love in this world. As for my gender identity, I think that there are several factors that create the gender that will be who you are in this world.

I think that the environment and the culture that you are raised in have a large part of who you are. I was raised in the South, with the thoughts from my religion being forced into my everyday life. This type of life as a young adult caused me to look at my own sexual self as something that was taboo.The rapes that I endured also had a part in shaping my sexuality, and created a self doubt that took years to undo.

I feel that if a child is told certain things about their sexual being then they will become what they have been told through out their lives. Yet there are a few that will test the limits and step outside these boundaries that were set by an older generation. Once we step outside and have a taste of the differences that are here for our sexual desires, we often never are able to step back and become who we were taught to become.Each person strives to achieve acceptance from their peers and family, yet the Sexuality ardest one to please is self. By not being able to accept what I am in self, you are not able to express the inner part of you that needs to be expressed. I feel that part of myself has been lost due to the rapes that were inflicted in my life, yet in the recent months I have been able to explore that fact that I may be interested in looking outside the boundaries that were sat for me in early childhood.

If the opportunity for me to explore the realm of bi-sexual experiences presents itself, I am wiling to now take the chance and experience it for myself.I may find a part of myself that was lost during those rapes. For me, I have learned a lot of lessons in the sexual realm of human nature and some have been helpful while others were not. I chose rape as my topic for this paper, merely because I am a victim/survivor.

When I look back at those moments and allow the feelings to resurface I find that there was no love only sexual satisfaction for those that were performing the act. I have tried to understand why this could have happened to me, could I have prevented it from happening, did I do something that created the emotions to stir within these men.I only come up with the fact that I was an innocent and they were the ones in control of the actions they were performing. It has taken several years for me to understand that I was not responsible for these actions and they have been a major part of my life as an adult. Many of these feelings have caused me to create relationships that were not healthy and were endangering my life.

Others were just fillers for the feeling of love that I was looking for with no real insight of what love truly was.As more of the fact became known to me and that I was not the responsible party I looked for a way to confront my Sexuality attackers. My Dad, being a major player in these acts was the first on my list. Once he was confronted with the memories I had of these acts, he asked for help.

We started to attend meetings and counseling for both the victim and the attacker and have been able to reach a ground of acceptance. I have been able to move forward in my life and secured a healthy and loving relationship with a man that has been able to over look the flaws that I found within myself.He has allowed me to experience the life every person should, which is total love and the ability to be accepted for who you are. Due to the experiences that were placed in my life at such a young age I have been made to look at life with a different type of clarity. I have never been able to just accept the attention from another without thinking that there was something else that was wanted. Yet when I was met and the man I now call my husband approached me in a laundry mat and told me I was beautiful.

I was unsure of the feelings I had.I was unsure if I should accept the comment as the truth or was there something else he wanted from me. After another run in with this man, I began to investigate who I was and if I could truly be loved. He was very patient and understood that I was trying to work through some very troubling problems in my life.

Yet he waited till I was ready to say I love you back , no matter that it took me a while to be able to speak that and mean it. The attraction factor for me was that he was willing to work on our lives together and help me to find out who I truly am.