The essay “Marriage and Love” by Emma Goldman and the story “To Room Nineteen” by Doris Lessing both talk about the union of man and woman that is marriage. Emma Goldman is a well known political activist of her time. Her writings and speeches gained popularity in the early 1900’s. She was an anarchist who was both admired and criticized by the people.
Doris May Lessing is a well known British writer, with works mostly about women. She received the Nobel Prize for Literature in 2007 because of her great talent. Her works shone a different light on womanhood, as she wrote more about the female experience.In both works, the authors describe how a failed relationship could drive a woman to become a parasite. It is not truly her fault, as she is just a victim of circumstance. The union of man and woman that is marriage is the one to be blamed for making a parasite out of the woman.
By losing all her freedom, she is nothing more but a dependent creature trapped in the four corners of her house, her prison. Emma Goldman states that “the marriage insurance condemns her to life-long dependency, to parasitism, to complete uselessness (Goldman, 1911). As compared to man, the woman is more limited by marriage, as the man is still able to go out to work, while the woman is contained in the house, feeding on whatever the man bring home. For the part of the woman, marriage is a curse instead of a protection.
Marriage causes the woman to be become a parasite, to depend solely on the man for sustenance. It is the union that “incapacitates her for life’s struggle, annihilates her social consciousness, paralyzes her imagination (Goldman, 1911). ” It is a trap, a snare disguised as a means of protection for the woman that would condemn her to lifelong parasitism.The same situation can be observed with Doris Lessing’s “To Room Nineteen”. Before Susan and Matthew Rawlings marriage, Susan was working in an advertising firm, and is able to provide for herself whatever she needs for living.
Marriage was like a self-imposed prison for her, subjecting her for a life-long stay inside her house. This was the time that she became a parasite, with nothing to do but wait for his husband to come home from work, feeding from whatever he makes out of his job. As years went through, their marriage went flat, growing tired of what they have been doing for the previous years (Lessing, 1978).Susan’s life is more of a parasite now than before because her children were already going to school, leaving her alone in their house. Because of that, she sought a different life, even just for a day, in order to somehow escape her prison. She rented a room in a shabby hotel where she can at least enjoy her freedom even for a short period of time.
Both Goldman and Lessing wrote about women becoming parasites when they get married. It is true, especially during their time, when the men were expected to work for his family, and the women were expected to tend to their house and their children.With this setup, it is unavoidable to have a parasitic relationship between them because the women wouldn’t have anything to do in the house. Despite all the housework, she loses the productivity that she could have enjoyed when she’s out of the house working or doing stuff just like the man. Being a parasite is something negative, because you’re benefiting from what other people’s output.
But it is not the fault of the woman that they became parasites. It is marriage that condemn them to life-long parasitism, something they can only avoid if they enjoy the freedom that their male counterparts are able to enjoy.
